7 Ways To Know The Will Of God In Marriage

In my previous article, we discussed understanding the will of God in marriage. We said that the will of God has to do with God’s principles, desires, rules, regulations, etc. In this article, we will be focusing on how you can know the will of God in marriage.

Anytime I say or write something about the will of God in marriage, how it is important to allow God to lead and direct a person to the right spouse and if possible allow God to choose a partner for a person, people always have a different view about it.

Some time ago, I wrote an article that the best way to find a life partner is to allow God to lead, direct or choose a life partner for you because He is the only One that knows the best suited and fitted person for your life and destiny. He is the Founder and Inventor of marriage. He is the perfect Matchmaker.

As expected, the article gathered some reactions from different people. Some people saw the importance of what I was saying and asked me how they can allow God to choose for them or how they will know the person God has chosen for them

Some other people dismissed the possibility of God choosing a life partner for His children that allowed Him to choose for them. They argued that God does not choose a wife for people, that ever since Adam accused God of choosing Eve for him, He hands off from choosing a partner for His children.

Some even quoted the Scripture: “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favour from the Lord, “(Prov. 18:22) to refute what I said. Most people misunderstood this very Scripture a lot. Because the Scripture asks you to find doesn’t mean you should do it in isolation from God.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. (Prov. 3:5‭-‬6 NIV)

In the book of Proverbs, the Bible says, “Houses and wealth are inherited from parents, but a PRUDENT WIFE IS FROM THE LORD.” (Prov. 19:14 Emphasis mine)

The scripture even asked two vital questions…

1. “Many claims to have unfailing love, BUT A FAITHFUL MAN WHO CAN FIND?”(Prov. 20:6)

2. “A WIFE OF NOBLE CHARACTER WHO CAN FIND? She is worth far more than rubies.”(Prov. 31:10)

Who can help you to find a faithful man in this generation if not God?

Who can help you to find a woman of noble character, a virtuous woman if not God?

You are a limited individual, you are limited in knowledge and foresight.

You don’t know the person that best suits your needs in life and destiny more than God.

Do you know that person you think is best for you?

Only God knows what that person will turn out to be in the future. You don’t. This is more reason you need to allow God to choose for you.

Here Is How It Happens…

You are a free moral agent, and that means you have the right to make choices. That’s one of the greatest powers God has given to man. You can choose who you want to marry, and God will not fight you for it. He respects your choice. Your choice, your consequences.

But then, if you are afraid of the future, if you are afraid that you will make the wrong choice of a life partner if you want to get a faithful man, a woman of noble character, and want God to choose for you, you have to step aside, you have to surrender your choice to Him.

God won’t force anyone on you. You have to ask Him FIRST before He will interfere. Until you hand over, He can’t take over.

This Is How To Allow God To Choose For You

As a man, you are seeking a wife, a help meet for your life and destiny, you don’t corner a sister because she’s beautiful, endowed or a prayer warrior, she may not suit your life and the dimensions of your destiny.

Instead, you go to God in prayers and ask Him to help you choose a wife that suits your life and the destiny He has for you.

As a woman believing in God for a husband, when men start approaching you, seeking your hand in marriage or a relationship, you don’t just accept anyone because he is handsome and wealthy or jumps into a relationship with him, that man may be your burial ground.

Instead, you go to God in prayers to know among these men, the one He has chosen for your life and destiny.

I strongly maintain that prayer is the best way to find a life partner, going to God in prayers until He reveals your partner to you.

Now, after praying, how do you know if that man or woman is the person God has chosen for you?

The first thing to do is to know how God speaks to you as an individual. God has various and peculiar ways He speaks to and directs His children. So you have to know how God speaks to you personally.

Ways To Know The Will Of God In Marriage

1. The Word of God

God speaks and leads through the Word by making a particular verse of the Bible that is similar to what you are going through or asking for to stand out or to make a deep impression on you.

You know how some words used to touch you deeply, that’s what I mean. For example, God can use this verse to warn you not to enter a relationship or marriage with that person: “There is a way that appears to be right, but in the end, it leads to death.” (Prov. 14:12)

Or He can use this verse to give you His approval to go ahead, “…surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”(Matt. 28:20)

This is how God leads by the Word, He causes either a verse or a chapter to stand out to you. He can also use a story in the Bible to speak to you. The story will come alive to you and will be fresh as though you haven’t read the story before.

2. Inner peace

I listen carefully to what God the Lord is saying, for he speaks peace to his faithful people. But let them not return to their foolish ways. (Psalms 85:8 NLT)

The presence of peace of mind or lack of peace of mind is another way God speaks, leads, and confirms His will.

If you are about to go into a relationship or marriage with someone and you have peace of mind, nothing troubles your mind about it, there is no doubt in your mind or on the other hand you don’t have peace about it, God may be speaking to you. Pause and listen.

3. Inner witness

The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children.(Romans 8:16 NIV)

This is a supernatural knowing that is beyond every reasonable doubt. The knowledge comes from the Spirit. You just know that this is the person for you but you can’t tell how you arrived at that conclusion, that is inner witness.

You know that the brother or the sister is for you just like you know your name. It’s a knowing. That’s one of the ways God speaks.

4. Inner voice

“The Spirit told Philip, “Go to that chariot and stay near it.”(Acts 8:29)

This voice comes from your inside. Now and then, we’re always saying something on the inside. If God speaks to you in this way, He will speak to your heart and you will know.

The Holy Spirit spoke to Philip to approach the chariot and minister to the eunuch. It was not an audible voice. It was the voice on the inside.

5. Audible voice

“Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.” (Isaiah 30:21)

This is hearing a voice with your ears but you can’t see who’s talking to you. This voice comes from the outside.

It is like what happened to Apostle Paul on his way to Damascus to persecute the church. (Acts 9:1-9).

6. Prophet/pastor/leader/mentor

Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counsellors there is safety. (Proverbs 11:14)

Sometimes God can speak to other people on your behalf. When you are not sensitive enough or lack an understanding of what He is telling you, He can talk to your leader, Pastor, mentor, or prophet on your behalf.

However, you need to confirm it to know if God is the One speaking. I will get to that shortly.

7. Visions or Revelations

But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. (Matt. 1:20 NIV)

Mary became pregnant mysteriously and Joseph was finding it hard to believe her that it was through the power of God that she got pregnant.

Naturally, that was impossible. The only way for a woman to get pregnant is to sleep with a man. Joseph was considering divorcing her when God sent an angel to talk to Joseph in the dream. That was the only way to convince Joseph. When he woke up, he took Mary home to be his wife.

Vision or revelation is another way God reveals His will and directs His children. Just as God spoke to Joseph, He can also speak to you in the dream of the night concerning the person He wants you to marry or not to marry.

Vision or revelation can come in the form of…

Dreams

Dreams are visionary experiences during sleep. The things you see while you’re sleeping. God can come to your dream and reveal His will.

Trances

This is a situation of being half asleep and half awake. You’re not sleeping and you’re not awake, you’re just in between and then you see or hear something. That’s a trance. God can also speak to you through this means depending on the situation on the ground.

These are just some of the ways God reveals His will in marriage to His children. The list is not exhaustive. The will of God in marriage can be known through any of these 7 ways we have examined.

How To Confirm The Will Of God In Marriage

1. Put it to the test of the Word of God.

Whatever you see or hear must conform to the Word of God. If you’re a believer and you see yourself getting married to an unbeliever, that dream is not from God because the Bible says that we should not be unequally yoked with an unbeliever. (2 Cor. 6:14)

A man that wants you to get pregnant for him before he marries you is not the will of God for you.

A woman that wants to sleep with you to know if you’re man enough to perform cannot be the will of God in marriage for you.

The Bible says we should flee fornication and immorality in general.

2. Put it to the test Peace of mind

Another way to confirm if what you heard or saw is from God is through the presence of peace of mind or the absence of peace.

If you’re doing something and you don’t have peace, God is telling you to stop it.

When you are on something and you have peace of mind, and the thing is in line with the Word of God, that’s a sign that God is involved.

If you lack peace or enough conviction about the relationship or marriage plans, that may be a sign that God does not want you to marry that person.

These are some of the ways to confirm if what you heard or saw is accurate. The Bible says through the mouth of one or three witnesses every matter shall be established.

In Conclusion

If you are not a child of God the things I have said here may be useless to you. God cannot reveal his will in marriage to you or direct or lead you because you are not His child.

If you want to know the will of God in marriage, if you want to enjoy the leading and direction of God, then you have to repent of your sins and accept the Lord Jesus Christ into your life. That’s only when God will be obligated to help you.

Did you find this article helpful, please share your thoughts with me in the comment section and also share with your friends?

Thanks for reading
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