Understanding The Will Of God In Marriage

A lot has been said and written about the will of God in marriage. The will of God in marriage is a concept that many people do not understand. In this article, we will examine what the will of God in marriage is and then look at ways to know the will of God in marriage for your life.

What The Will Of God Is Not

There are different schools of thought schools of thought among Christians about what the will of God in marriage is. One school of thought says that the will of God in marriage is someone God specially created for a person from birth to marry.

That is, a man or woman whom God created and ordained for a person that he or she must marry and if he or she fails to marry that man or woman, he or she has made a mistake in marriage.

This school of thought is wrong. God didn’t specially create or ordain a person for anyone to marry. To marry or not to marry a person is solely an individual’s choice.

In 1 Corinthians 7:39, Apostle Paul says, ”A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.”

This passage debunks the claim that God specially created and ordained anyone for a person to marry. Apostle Paul was saying, in essence, that if anyone loses his or her spouse to death, the person is free to remarry anyone he or she wishes on the condition that the person must be and belong to the Lord Jesus. In other words, the person must be from the Christian fold.

The will of God in marriage is not one mystical man or woman whom God from birth created and ordained for a person to marry. It will only take a person to break the circle. Take for instance, if God ordained that Josh must marry Rose but Rose got married to Williams instead, what then will Josh do? Should he remain single for life because the woman that was created for him to marry is married to someone else?

However, since God didn’t create or ordain anyone for us to marry, it is not everyone that He will want us to marry. He gave criteria or guidelines for choosing a life partner.

What Is The Will Of God In Marriage?

1. It is the will of God for us to get married

“The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” (Gen. 2:18 NIV)

God wants us to get married so we can multiply and subdue the earth.

2. It is the will of God that marriage provides companionship and help for our lives and destiny.

“The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”” (Gen. 2:18 NIV)

Loneliness was never God’s idea. God created most things in twos so they will be able to each other with companionship and help.

The very thing that inspired God to create marriage was because Adam was alone. So it is the will of God in marriage for us to have someone with whom we share our lives.

3. It is the will of God that marriage occurs between a man and a woman

“So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds in the sky, and all the wild animals. But for Adam, no suitable helper was found. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.” (Gen. 2:20‭, ‬22‭-‬23 NIV)

God never approves of same-sex marriage. The first-ever marriage was between a man and a woman, Adam and Eve, and not Adam and Eve or with animals. Same-sex marriage was never and is not the will of God in marriage.

4. It is the will of God in marriage that people are not unequally yoked in marriage.

“Do not intermarry with them. Do not give your daughters to their sons or take their daughters for your sons, for they will turn your children away from following me to serve other gods, and the Lord’s anger will burn against you and will quickly destroy you.” (Deut. 7:3‭-‬4 NIV)

God commanded the Israelites of old not to intermarry the people of Hittites, Girgashites, Amorites, Canaanites, Perizzites, Hivites, and Jebusites, not because of their ethnicity or religion but so that they don’t turn them from serving the Living God.

So, it is the will of God in marriage that a Christian marries his or her fellow Christian and not unequally yoked with someone from another religion. People from the same religion should marry each other. (2 Cor. 14)

5. It is the will of God in marriage that we marry by choice, not by manipulation or compulsion.

“For there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others—and there are those who choose to live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it.” (Matt. 19:12 NIV)

Since it is the will of God in marriage for us to get married, it is not a must that we will get married. Marriage is by choice, it is not compulsory.

6. It is the will of God in marriage for us to marry good partners

“An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, But she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones.” (Prov. 12:4 NKJV)

“Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies.” (Prov. 31:10 NKJV)

When God created the first marriage it was meant to last forever in happiness but unfortunately the rate of failed marriages and divorce today is alarming. That was not the will of God in marriage from the beginning. The will of God is until death do us apart.

Among the causes of these failures and divorces in marriages today are as a result of getting married to the wrong partners.

Some people are currently facing different types of abuse in their marriages, some have been killed unfortunately as a result of getting married to the wrong life partners.

The will of God in marriage is for us to get married to good partners who will love and treat us right as ordained by God from the beginning.

7. It is the will of God in marriage for us to someone that He is pleased with.

“As soon as Jesus was baptised, he went up out of the water. At that moment heaven was opened, and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and alighting on him. And a voice from heaven said, “This is my Son, whom I love; with him, I am well pleased.” (Matt 3:16‭-‬17NIV)

“I find more bitter than death the woman who is a snare, whose heart is a trap and whose hands are chains. The man who pleases God will escape her, but the sinner she will ensnare.” (Eccles. 7:26 NIV)

Sometimes the Lord will have us marry a specific individual whom He is pleased with and feels best suits us and the destiny He has for us.

Among the many brothers and sisters in the Lord, God can lead you to any one of them who best suits you and your needs as an individual.

Now, this doesn’t mean that God forces His will upon us, He doesn’t. Remember, it is the will of God in marriage to marry the right partners. So He directs us to the right individuals.

However, we reserve the right to accept or not to accept the person He leads us to so that we can be responsible for our choices.

In Conclusion

The will of God in marriage doesn’t have to do with just an individual, it encompasses the principles, desires, rules, and regulations of God concerning marriage.

Make sure you marry in the will of God, that’s one of the best guarantees to having a successful marriage.

How do you know that someone is the will of God in marriage for you? How do you discover that? What are the signs that someone is the will of God in marriage for you? How do you confirm? Stay tuned, in my next post I will treating this subject in details.

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